It's all over! or is it?!

It's Monday 26th April 2010. My legs ache, my right knee is sending constant shooting pains up to my lower back, I am grabbing onto anything within reach every time I need to stand, and thank goodness my flat has a lift!!! I'm also ecstatic! Yesterday I completed the 30th London Marathon! I did say completed! This is important, as there was quite a few periods during the run when I was uncertain of the end.

I got up at 615 yesterday morning, slowly and methodically got ready, ate my porridge and fruit (normally delicious, I felt like it was food being shoved down before an interview), and grabbed my kit bag. There was a quick stop for an encouraging hug from my cousin - definitely needed - before I headed off for the bus start the trek to the start line.

I met the other Rainforest Foundation charity runners at our official photographer's house for last minute reassurance from the charity organiser's and the other runners. I had met a few of the other runners at premarathon events, but it was great for us all to be together the morning of the big day. We were all smiles and appeared relaxed together. They were like instant friends. We all had different aims, but I think we were all equally nervous about heading into the unknown. I don't think we were even aware of what we were about to do. I wasn't.

I have been training properly since last August. I've gradually increased my weekend distances as suggested, and have been consistant with my midweek runs. I even cross trained, which is recommended. About 2 months ago I injured my knee, and had to take a little time off to heal... this hit me hard as it happened during the peak of my training. It was frustrating after all that training to find that I'd been held back. I took it easy, but then when I ran again my knee was aggravated, so I decided the best thing to do was to switch to swimming and not run much at all until the big day. So I haven't had any real niggles in my knee for a while and being super optimistic I assumed all was well. I hadn't really thought about what I would do if my knee went on the day, I was more concerned about hitting the wall.

Of course the weather forecasted a blazer, and therefore we were hit by torrential rains for about 15 minutes as we were checked out kits bags, peed for the final time, and headed to the start line. There were masses of people huddling under the few trees around, the face paint from the eccentric costumed runners was streaming down their faces, but everyone remained in high spirits. On the whole, rain would've been a lot better than the scorcher expected. The storm passed, and by the time the buzzer started we were dry again, if a little cooler.

Actually I seemed to miss the buzzer. I was in pen 5 (with the aim of finishing in 3.45), and the 'masses', as they keep referring to us normal runner, started moving forward. I followed and the next thing I knew I was running and we'd crossed the startline. What?! I tried to smile for the cameras and wave and listen to the commentary... it's all a blur now... I think Boris Johnson was there... possibly... :S

The pace was nice and slow, perfect, just as I'd planned. We started to meet the crowds immediately, they were lined along the road cheering us on. There were lots of children holding out their hands for high fives. Runners around me were chatting, and it was generally a cheerful, easygoing atmosphere. We ran past houses and pubs that had been fully decorated in theme to show support. I remember one pub that had been made up like a ship, full of pirated cheering staff. There were big bands, djs, little quartets, random squarks, all sorts to keep our ears busy. I felt fine for the first 6 miles I think. Then suddenly I felt the knee twinge. I was still doing slow 9 minute miles, so I don't think it would've helped to slow down... and I didn't. It was from there onwards that the pain gradually got worse, starting in my knee, and gradually working up my thigh. I knew I had 'fans', waiting to cheer me on around mile 14 and I wanted to be running then. I think around mile 12 it started to get quite painful, but there were too many other things to think about, and to preoccupy me. As I ran over Tower Bridge at around mile 13 I looked around and took it all in. It was such a view and such a symbolic marathon landmark. Apparently I reached the halfway mark at about 2hrs2min, so I had been running fairly well until that point. From then on I was looking around to see my friends in the crowds... but talk about needle in a haystack, there were so many people and the roar of cheers so was immense, it was impossible. I did see one friend, but only realised after I had passed, and I didn't stop. The Rainforest Foundation had a cheering group around 17 miles. At that point my knee was truly hurting, and I had to walk/run quite a lot. Luckily I was plodding along in semi-run when I suddenly heard cheers for me. Energy came from nowhere, I ran up to them, waving, and cheering, yelled "I'm dying!!!!" and continued. It made me smile, and then laugh... after being so exhausted I had no idea where that burst had come from. The same thing happened around mile 19... somewhere in Canary Wharf... when I suddenly heard "go, Aksinia!" from voices that I recognised... I turned and like an eagle found my friends. I had been walking, but went careening towards them, gave them massive hugs (I think I bonked a few other spectators out of the way to get to them), and went on my way again. Each time I was personally cheered I suddenly had energy to try a little bit harder. Somewhere around there I also came to the realisation that all the people walking (including me) weren't just in need of a rest, I think we were all in pain. It wasn't physically possible to keep on running. It would take a lot of energy to start running again; I focussed, slowed down, and then changed my stride. I don't know that it made me much faster. Actually energy is not the right word, as I wasn't particularly tired. I felt hydrated, energized, but in pain. I couldn't fight the knee pain. I felt it getting weaker, and more like I was dragging my leg along, I almost tripped a few times, and thought it might completely give way a couple times. I had to stop to get the pain to subside, before trudging on again. I missed the last few mile markers, but from the 24 mile mark I had started running, nothing was going to stop me, I knew I was going to finish. I limp/ran from there to the end. Every marker I came to I expected to be closer to the end, but instead was hit by how little ground I'd covered! It really was the longest mile. I think the crowds could see our pain, but between their cheers, and other runners support I made it down to Buckingham Palace and turned the corner to head to the finish line. There was no sprint finish. Not by me, not by anyone around. I had to hold back the flood of tears! I got my medal and met the charity again for lots of hugs, cheers, and champagne!

I wish that I hadn't injured my knee, and had been able to do the marathon in full health. It was a bit defeating. But then there were so many things that made me smile, and cry (generally from happiness) on the run. Runners were so supportive of eachother even when they were suffering from their on fair share of pain. People were running for important charities, in memory of loved ones, just for their own personal goals. Most of the people I ran with had raised at least as much money as I had. I was overwhelmed a number of times by realisation of being part of the London Marathon. I completed 26.2 miles. It's not just double a half marathon. It might have taken me just over 5 hours (just under if you take away the toilet break), but I completed it, and I have a medal to prove it! I will one day do another one... but first I'm going to give my knee some TLC.

Well done to everyone who took part in the London Marathon! Congrats!